I overslept. We ALL overslept. I vaguely remember Spencer
waking me to say goodbye. The next thing I knew, Elliana was requesting
breakfast. Twincy was curled up next to me, sound asleep. Twinjay, I could now
hear, was downstairs crying. I had no idea how long she’d been up, but she was
crying LOUD, and I felt AWFUL.
That poor baby! Time to apply a thick layer of guilt impenetrable by reason.
Normally, Elliana’s routine is to go potty and get dressed
before heading downstairs. Of course, she chose today to announce she wanted to
eat first. That always slows things down and there simply wasn’t time to spare.
We all had to get ready, and out the door, ASAP. This meant dressed, breakfast,
diaper changes, nursing, the whole works. The likelihood of this happening
without a late arrival to school was slim. However, I wasn’t willing to admit
defeat yet. And, I am pretty sure I was sleep-walking.
So, I raced downstairs to rescue poor, sad, Twinjay. She
quickly cheered (though, even as I write, I still feel bad) and I began
changing her diaper. Of course, Twinjay was soaked and needed to be completely
changed. She is masterful at detaching her diaper, even through a onesie. I, on
the other hand, am not as skilled at re-closing the diaper through clothing.
So, I was in a major race against time.
Now, Twincy’s clothes were dry but, while changing, she
began to pee. She’s a champion pee-er and I found myself hurrying to secure the
diaper in time. It’s not that I wanted her to be stuck in a wet diaper, but I
really wanted to avoid another outfit change. I thought something was working
my way until I sat her up and realized the pee had gone all over her back. And
so, outfit change it was.
Meanwhile, Elliana was firmly resisting bathroom duties with
her usual “Pee doesn’t come out!” retort. I calmly reminded her that she needed
to try, and also get dressed, before breakfast. To that, her face clouded over
and she disappeared into the bathroom. I was NOT confident that she was doing
anything productive in there. Trying to speed up a three-year-old is a losing
battle.
I returned to something I thought might be more successful –
feeding the babies. With no time to get the nursing pillow, I propped them up
in bed the best I could. Normally, the two are pretty on-task, but this time
Twincy decided to alternate nursing with deep, soul-searching stares. Now, I am
ALL for bonding with my children but this was so NOT the time for a leisurely
feed!
I had to prematurely end the “session” to locate Elliana.
She had decided she needed help with all her morning tasks (after all, her
sisters do get that service!). With no time to disagree, and a dizzy feeling
taking over me (yes, in major need of food and water), I found myself traipsing
upstairs to assist. She was satisfied by my company and complied for
everything, even tooth brushing.
Still, there was breakfast to be had, hair to comb, a car to
warm, and all 3 kids needed to get into carseats. Not to mention, today was the
rare day I scheduled for a friend to visit. Even better, our house looked like
a place where laundry goes to die, and my father-in-law was scheduled to arrive
in a few hours.
After gathering food for Elliana to eat en-route, I
determined that I too must eat or risk doing a face-plant. I seized the box of
Raisin Bran and managed to stab a few spoonfuls in while Elliana wasn’t looking. This was so NOT modeling eating at the table with careful
chewing. Finally, we were out the
door!
As if wishing for speed gifted me with delays, I hit the
next roadblock. By the time we got to the car, Elliana insisted that she do her own carseat buckle. WHY couldn’t she
have exercised this independence INSIDE the house??!? Because, I tell myself,
that would have been easy.
After she was secured, I hopped into the driver’s seat and
proceeded to glue my stubborn hairs down with Neutrogena Hand Cream. This guaranteed that fifteen minutes
later I’d look like I hadn’t showered in four days. It also cancelled any possibility
of skipping a shower before KT arrived. However, my focus was on getting
Elliana to school. We were on our way and I was in the zone.
…
For the record, we were totally late.
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