It is particularly awesome when your 3-year old bolts in the house, charging towards the bathroom, where you are precariously positioned while pre-beach waxing (cost saving measure). Lately, I've repeatedly reminded her that she is not to cover her body with yogurt at the table...or ever. HOW is what I am doing going to make sense? I knew she was on her way home but that didn't help much except to increase my panic level (since I couldn't exactly stop midway). I knew, because Spencer had called to say they were on their way home. How did I answer the phone, you ask? Oh, well I was making jam this morning (yes, because these are helpful things to do the morning before you leave for a week-long trip). And, I decided to try and wax while Spencer was out of the house with Elliana (this is round 2 mind you, I started the other day). However, this did mean I was watching J and C while waxing, which meant I was slightly rigid with worry the whole time that one of them would need me, or cry uncontrollably, when I couldn't get to them. I should also mention that I had decided to wax my whole legs, not just bikini area.
Ok, back to the phone call. I had heard the timer go off in the kitchen and I needed to re-warm the wax because the babies kept needing me. So, I crept into the kitchen from our bathroom using a paper towel to cover my lower half (wearing only a nursing tank seems to be my specialty). Thankfully, the curtains were closed. I turned off the timer on the oven and decided I could not deal with the jam so I turned it off and hoped it wouldn't solidify before I could get to it. At the same time, Spencer called. I answered the phone with the fingers that weren't waxy and he told me our friend KJ and her son, Booker, were on their way to our house (OMG!!). I quickly gave him the background and raced into the bathroom in fear that I would have multiple visitors and the set-up with the twins wouldn't allow me to close the bathroom door (again, wax all over one hand limits ability to move them).
Fast forward to Elliana's racing feet, followed by Booker's, right into our bedroom! I literally hid behind the half open bathroom door and called for Spencer. He rescued Booker and Elliana (or me, depending on how you look at it) and I tried to clean up as FAST AS POSSIBLE. So far, Elliana hadn't noticed any of my bathroom doings as she had bolted into the bedroom to touch C's hands. If she had seen there would be NO way to distract her or make her stop asking questions (this child misses NOTHING!). In my haste, I somehow got wax all over me. Literally, it looked like I'd plunged my hands into the wax container. I tried water (hot and cold - again - making impulsive decisions). Neither worked. Soap didn't help. I called for Spencer multiple times (he was still trying to help Elliana get out the door to the park with our friend's mother). He came in and, amidst laughter, located the tiny (emphasis on tiny), bottle of solution that helps remove wax (literally it is smaller than a nail polish container).
As he tried to give it to me it tipped over on the counter so I furiously tried to wipe up any drops as this couldn't be wasted! After about five minutes of trying to wipe the 1/8" of glue off my hands I had marginal success. Oh, and not just wax all over me but hair too. Awesome. Hot. I am a catch!
The knob to our sink, the top to the soap, and a spot on the floor still have glue. I think most of the evidence is in the trash. The cloths are in the sink (and may need to be tossed too since the bottle of heaven is empty and I am afraid to plunge my hands into that mess again).
I decided to throw my pajama pants back on so I could say hello to KJ, feed J, and handle the jam before my friend Super E stops over (little does she know she'll be on baby duty while she's here - though I know she won't mind)! Now, I have blue fabric from my pants stuck to me in numerous places as I certainly didn't have time, or solution enough, to even try to deal with the remnants of wax on my legs.
Elliana and Booker are on their way to the park with KJ. The jam is now setting in the fridge. Super E is here and Spencer is oh-so curious what I am doing in here (if I don't capture these moments as they happen they'll be lost forever! - I know you are crying at the thought).
I have not showered. I actually might have food in my teeth (anything is possible since I just spent the past hour in a bathroom looking anywhere but a mirror!). I still have a cold although I am trying to kick it. And, interestingly, C and J have the same nostril that's congested - same as last cold...odd.
Ok, beach. In all my glory, here I come!